I felt the love in my heart
And a tear rolled down my face.
My sister and her partner’s vows got me really good last Saturday.
It was a special moment for me and it got me thinking about the biggest relationship paradigm shift I had had, that I could share with them..
And it was this…
One of the biggest killers of an intimate relationship,
Is mistaking everyday things you do as a contribution to your intimate relationship.
Doing house duties.
Raising your children.
Managing your finances.
And the mistake of expecting these actions to ‘set your partner’s world, libido and desire on fire’ leads many partners to resent the other.
Truth is, if it is something that you would still do if you were single, then it’s a contribution to your life together.
If it’s something that you only do with a partner, then it’s a contribution to your intimate relationship.
Now don’t get me wrong, these things all matter for a life together. And most intimate relationships won’t last if you don’t contribute to a life together.
But, a lot of intimate relationships tend to drag on when you have built a life together and stopped contributing to your intimate relationship and being together.
Imagine that you have a bucket for each area of life and for every action you take, you could only put into one area.
Manage Finances goes into financial.
Raising Kids goes into the family.
Working goes into business or a career.
Doing house duties goes into the family.
Can you see how these things don’t go into your intimate relationships?
But if we were to say,
Taking my partner out on dates.
Giving them a massage.
Showing them appreciation.
Leaving them little love notes.
Sharing your needs and vulnerabilities with them.
Where would all these go?
Yep, directly into your intimate relationship.
So today I encourage you to ask yourself
Am I contributing directly to my intimate relationship or am I contributing to our life together?
Then make the changes you need to make to start building and contributing back to that part of your life.
The investment of the energy to do so will grow and enhance all the other areas of life. Guaranteed.
Until next week when I am back in full swing,
Keep smashing growth ceilings.